i'm unbelievably awake at 429! i can only say that the past few months have been nothing short of hectic, chaotic, and surprising. i just sent a really long email to adolfo...crazy singaporean-chilean exchanges. and the more i wrote, the more i wanted to write, which led me to this. july has been a really stressful and frustrating month. i ran into a lot of administration problems (what's new?) which i know are beyond my control, but i can't stand the feeling of not knowing how to deal with things methodically. and i couldn't organise my life properly which made me even more crazy. i also got rejected for the design council scholarship so i couldn't help relieve some of dad's financial burdens. then i played a bad joke on myself. let's say, i was brought out of my space-cadet world for a while and i felt human, in touch, and connected to this world. a different and new side of me emerged, which left a few friends speechless at the mahjong table. but let's also say that, i was happy and in despair at the same time. out of sorts. completely. but if everything is a matter of perception, then we know that everything is fleeting and fading except your self, a living being, the fact that you can still think, and can therefore make room for better things to come.